US Opens Alien Defense Headquarters!

My favorite news site is reporting that the US government has opened an ADH- Alien Defense Headquarters. It makes sense since there is supposed to be an Alien attack later this year! I’m wondering how this new headquarters will compare to the Men In Black…I bet their weapons and Agents aren’t nearly as cool! On second thought- it must be a decoy because we know that the REAL Alien Defense Department is top secret!


Bill Hader’s Andy Warhol in MIB3

As we know, Agent J goes back in time to save Agent K in MIB3. So, of course he would meet some pretty cool characters from the past! Bill Hader (who is awesome) plays Andy Warhol, who is revealed to be an undercover MIB! It figures- he was known for some unusual art, and he hung out with some strange looking people…they could definitely be Aliens! (PS. Agent J telling Warhol that he is going to “B*#ch slap the shiznit” out of him, could possibly be my favorite trailer quote ever!)

More Celebrity Aliens Revealed!

I’ve got some new celebrity Aliens for you! It has been revealed that: The Beatles, Yoko Ono, Jimi Hendrix, Kareem Abdul Jabbar, and Fidel Castro are all potential Aliens in MIB3!

I can definitely see Yoko Ono as an Alien, and Fidel Castro as an ET is a hilarious idea! The others I’m not sure… though you never know the kind of tricks the MIB are going to pull!

I learned recently that Castro has been spotted spending time with Aliens before!

And Yoko Ono has built the “Imagine Peace Tower” in Iceland, which looks REALLY suspicious…looks like an Alien portal to me!

Alien Captured Alive!

Oh no! It looks like the MIB have slipped up this time- they were photographed with an Alien! Someone didn’t get their mind-eraser out in time! Thank goodness the Weekly World News has the sense to put it in print so everyone knows the truth!

AMERICAN AGENTS captured a space alien at a UFO landing site in western Virginia on March 29, 2012, proving once and for all that the extraterrestrials do exist and have a keen interest in the affairs of mankind and planet Earth!

Dramatic photos of the creature being hustled into a safe house before it was moved to a secret location in the nation’s capital showed it to be tall and lanky with a large, bulb-shaped head.

Sources further revealed that the alien spoke English both forward and backward. And for a time it cooperated fully with agents who made a priority of trying to find out its reasons for coming to Earth as well as the technology that got it here.

“This is the moment we’ve been waiting for since the U.S government first began investigating UFOs in the 1940’s,” the UFO investigator, who got the pictures and broke the story, told The Weekly World News at the time of the creature’s capture.

“The government has lied to us before about UFOs and space aliens but this time there will be no lies,” he continued. “This time we’ve got photographic proof that the creature is in custody.”

An agency spokesmen denied the UFO expert’s allegations and actually threatened to “neutralize” a NEWS correspondent who pressed for details.

But the researcher himself, who requested anonymity to avoid reprisals, claimed to have no less than 12 highly-placed intelligence sources who can back up his story.

He went on the say: “On the morning of September 29 I got a tip that agents had captured the alien while investigating a UFO landing in western Virginia’s mountains the night before.

The dramatic photos above recorded the historic capture of a space alien by federal agents.

The creature is shown as it was being hustled into a safe house.

“My source told me that the craft had come and gone by the time agents arrived. But a sweep of the area produced a single extraterrestrial who was hiding in a clump of bushes some 75 yards from the landing site. The source also told me that the alien would choice. I ran to my car and got be taken to a safe house for questioning later that day. When the agents and the extraterrestrial arrived, I was hiding in an alley across the street with my camera and nine rolls of film.

“The pictures I got show that the alien was handcuffed. And when the agents escorted him out of the safe house 45 minutes later, one of them has his coat off and in the photos you can see a gun on his belt.

“I wanted to follow them in my car but one of the agents spotted me and pointed at my camera.  When that happened I had not choice.  I ran to my car and got the hell out of there.  I had to protect the film.”

Sources later told him that the alien was moved at least six times as agents tried to keep its capture secret but just three weeks later the creature kicked down the door to a holding cell, “incapacitated” 11 guards and escaped, prompting the UFO researcher to say:

“This is a tragedy of the first magnitude. We may never get a chance to question an extraterrestrial again.”

Weekly World News has interviewed dozens of experts and conducted exhaustive research to bring you this list of the top ten ways to recognize aliens in our midst.